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‘Confession.com’ holds up a mirror to
Turkish society
By Jerome Bastion - Agence France-Presse
ISTANBUL - Some 70,000 people log on daily to itiraf.com
(confession.com in English), pouring out their hearts or
vicariously sharing in the turmoils of life on a website which
holds up a mirror to Turkish society.
Many confessions touch on love and sex, matters that are
otherwise difficult to discuss openly in a male-dominated
society where religion and traditional values hold sway. The
website, set up by Ersan Ozer, a former journalist and
television producer, is now one of the most visited in the
country.
Women, fewer than 20 percent of whom are regular
Internet-users, are as numerous as men when it comes to
connecting to this site, according to Ozer.
Using only nicknames, people write in “speaking of love,
hate, joy, sadness, regret, everything that makes up life,”
says Ozer, who never expected the success that has made his
website a household name.
Some confessions lead to heated debates. The story of one
woman who recounted how her husband broke his foot kicking her
sparked a deluge of mail. It encouraged hundreds of others to
talk about domestic violence, a subject that remains otherwise
taboo in a country where girls are sometimes married off at a
young age against their will and where “honor killings” still
occur. Surveys suggest that 58 to 71 percent of women in
Turkey experience violence at home.
Sociologist Ali Ergur from Galatasaray University says the
stories shared reflect an image of “a society which has long
been oppressed socially and culturally by the hold of family
and community.” Today, society “is in transition and has
trouble coping with new problems that stem from people moving
to cities in ever-greater numbers and changes in lifestyle,”
says Ergur.
Stories often highlight the difficulties of living in a
country that straddles East and West.
“He left me recently because I was no longer a virgin. I
can’t understand the men of this country — either you’re a
virgin and not fit for company or you’re not and you’re even
less fit for company” wrote one 37-year-old woman from
Istanbul.
Ozer, who receives some 1,000 messages a day and selects
about 40 for his electronic agony column, says he’s “learned a
lot about the country, fellow citizens and especially about
women.” “Most stories are probably true, but veracity isn’t
the most important thing. What counts is the fact this forum
allows people to share intimate experiences in a spirit of
fellowship,” however virtual, Ozer
says. |